Relationships have been, are and will be an important part of our lives. Quality relationships have a beneficial effect on our health, strengthen our immunity and reduce the negative effects of stress. Simply put, they have the lion’s share of our life satisfaction. That is why it is important to be able to take care of our relationships and know when we are no longer able to handle them alone. Psychotherapy, whether individual or couples therapy, can help us develop our ability to relate to others and strengthen our skills in partnership, family, and work.
Everyone would like to meet naturally. However, once we leave the school environment and settle at one job, our opportunities for natural acquaintance diminish. On the other hand, online dating is nowadays a common and for the younger generation a completely natural alternative. Not only can you meet counterparts that you would hardly come across in the offline world, but you can also discover new places and, last but not least, improve your dating skills. It is important to stay open, not rely too rigidly on the first impression and give potential partners a chance. Even in natural dating, it takes some time for emotions to develop. For yourself, try to be natural, optimistic and clearly communicate the expectations you have from a first meeting.
Thanks to all the technology and world globalization, the long-distance relationship is much easier and more sustainable than ever before, yet it presents many difficulties. In a long distance relationship, it is important to communicate your needs and work together to find ways how (and how often) there will be communication and interaction between the partners. It is advisable to plan for the future and to know when and where the partners can spend time together and when they will be dependent on online technologies only. It is also crucial to talk about a future together and create a shared vision ideally with a time frame. This helps both partners to overcome obstacles and fight for the relationship even when they are already tired of the constant absence, and thus move towards future coexistence.
Infidelity is often a signal that something is not working in a relationship. Rather than addressing who the culprit and who the victim is, it is helpful to work with both partners and the relationship itself. How did that happen? How do we feel in our relationship? What are we experiencing? What did infidelity cause us? Couples’ psychotherapy offers a safe space where both partners can talk about their needs, hurts and the emotions that accompany their relationship, and where they can look for answers to all their questions. During conscious work to improve a relationship, hurting and threatening infidelity can be seen as a symptom of a relationship where the relationship needs to be repaired, and can provide valuable impulses to correct and restore partner intimacy and satisfaction.
Every partnership (regardless of its form) will sooner or later face relationship problems. These result from the diversity and uniqueness of the partners and from their different ideas, expectations, needs and possibilities in cohabitation. The most common problems in a relationship are different needs in sex, finances, spending free time, etc. Accepting that relationship problems can be part of a relationship and taking them as an opportunity to develop our partner satisfaction is the first step to maintaining a healthy and functional partnership.
Contacting an expert is useful whenever your partners feel dissatisfied with how they are resolving their relationship issues and conflicts. If they tend to stir up, deepen or escalate conflict and thus hurt each other even more, it is a call for help. The psychotherapist can provide partners with a safe, neutral ground, offer new perspectives and alternatives for resolving the conflict. Last but not least, the expert also helps the partners to develop their communication skills so that in the future they can deal with their relationship problems on their own.
It is natural that we face problems in our relationship, but that does not mean that we have to break up right away. Nevertheless, obstacles may arise where separation may be the right choice. Unequivocal reasons for separation may be the presence of violence (both physical and mental) or addiction, whether from one or both partners. In other situations, it depends on personal experience. In general, however, it can be good to consider ending the relationship if the relationship has not fulfilled you in a long time, has caused you mental or health problems and overall you think that your quality of life would be better without this relationship, it is good to consider ending it.
If it is difficult for you to decide, a visit to a psychotherapist can be helpful in this regard. A psychotherapist can give you an idea of what your life might look like after a breakup, not only from a personal, but also from an economic, social and logistical point of view. If you decide to break up, it is advisable to communicate your decision clearly and with respect for the other person in relationship. If you have children or joint property, it is important to clarify the subsequent procedure in the upbringing of the children or the redistribution of the property. Here, too, a visit to a psychotherapist can be useful, as it will provide you with a neutral ground where you can find a viable solution for both parties.
“I started going to therapy after my seventh breakup. I’ve never been able to do well with people. Thanks to the therapy, I learned that my difficulty maintaining relationships is related to the fact that I don’t trust people very much, because I have had a complicated relationship with my mother since childhood. Because I forgave my mother and now I understand where my problem came from, I no longer pass on my mistrust to others.”